I don't miss him anymore. I feel so betrayed. screw him and his family. I've found better. I just need to move on from the pain and fear,so I can be w/him. I am DONE. burning my bridges at last.
Monday, September 16, 2013
my dream about Rob
I just had a dream about Rob. I was supposed 2 be at work,but it def wasn't Sam's I was at. It was a regular grocery store-like a Winn Dixie or something,and somehow, they had me covering a break for a DEMO person. Now in real life, we don't cover breaks for THEM since they don't work work for the STORE, anyway lol. Anywho, Rob just walked right up to me. It's like when u look up, and u see somebody just walking real fast from a certain point as if they had started a while back and are on their way over to u(I dunno know how to describe it),but I had not noticed him come from an aisle or anything. It was completely open in this area. Like, I was in the back over by the deli/produce..those places,so it was pretty open,and I was not facing any of the aisles. It literally seemed like he had been walking for quite some time and only became visible once he was only a couple of feet away from me. He just walked-or might like hurried right over to me and as soon as he was close enough to talk to me, the 1st thing he says is, "do u know what happened to me?" He KNEW he was dead,but he didn't know why/how. I immediately got emotional. I was shocked at 1st to even see him,but when he asked me that I started crying as I told him, "No, I don't. I have no idea what happened to u." He had been suicidal in life,so I asked him, "u didn't do this to urself?" and he looked a me and used this tone of voice as if trying to convince me/trying to clear his name, he said, "No!" he didn't say it,but I sensed he was gonna add, "I would have never killed myself. I didn't wanna die." he never said it,but I think it was kinda left hanging there so 2 speak. I remember throwing myself in his arms, crying, and telling him over and over again how much I miss him. I told him once something all the lines of, "I know I'm supposed 2 live the rest of my life w/o u,but I don't want to. I miss u soooo much!" =( despite him being a ghost, I was able 2 hug him,and even jump in his arms. He had actually picked me up and was holding me. At some point,we had both left the store and were outside talking this time. It was weird. I think he might have mentioned God 2 me at some point,or maybe I did. I had asked him if he had seen God yet. and he was like, "hold on, I 'll go look." as if he was going to get a person,and walked to another side of the parking lot somewhere 2 find him. I don't remember what happened after that.
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