I don't miss him anymore. I feel so betrayed. screw him and his family. I've found better. I just need to move on from the pain and fear,so I can be w/him. I am DONE. burning my bridges at last.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Odd-ness
Normally,when I get home from school and fall asleep for hours like that,I'm up all night afterwards. Tonight tho, I fell asleep AGAIN,and had a strange dream,recently. lol I think my dream represented TODAY! I had my final writing exam today(which I DOUBT I did well on. =( ),and I believe my dream is supposed to take place AFTER the exam. Carlos is in my class(I def have an ever so slight crush on him),and there was some kind of bench out in the parkinglot,just outside where out class is.(there's no bench there tho,it's strictly parking lot there),and I was sitting there w/my things,and kinda looking at my laptop alot. There was actually another bench right behind me(actually,it was sorta set up like bleachers),and Carlos was sitting on that 1,like he too,was waiting for a ride. Anyway, I was kinda glancing back and forth btw,my laptop and him. lol I just thought he was really cute and couldn't quit staring. Also,I was half hoping he would turn around and look back at me. He's so nice,and I kinda thought if he turned and caught me staring,he would smile back. (btw,he has an INCREDIBLE smile.) The next time,I turned back to look at my laptop,and do something on it, I got startled by some1 that came right up to me. When I looked up,it was my friend,Satin. I hadn't expected to see her,and I told her so too. lol She didn't stick around for long before she turned around and left. When I glanced back again,Carlos was looking back at me this time. But this time, he turned back,gathered his stuff,and walked off. I noticed a car pull beside me which, was apparently HIS ride coz he got headed to this car. I remember glancing away for a sec and then looking back again. The next time I looked,I saw Carlos,pulling a little girl out of the car,and setting her flat on the ground. He looked like he was going to give her CPR; I could see him getting ready to start mouth to mouth on her. Something had happened ; all of a sudden,whoever was driving the car told him not to worry about it,and the girl was back on her feet and perfectly fine. Then they both got back in the car and left. I remember looking at Carlos w/adoration,or something along those lines. I thought it was really sweet that he was ready to save a little girl's life,and I found myself liking him that much more afterwards. Weird dream. lol I still have my TREMENDOUS crush on Grant Wilson,tho. Yes, Carlos IS reallllllllly cute,and yes,I did find myself staring at him this afternoon on the way to class,when he was far ahead of me. He DOES have a nice butt,and he is REALLY cute! ;) However, I STILL have a way bigger crush on/and all of my fantasies surround, Grant Wilson. =) lol
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